Encourage your children to go for premarital counseling

KAMPALA - It is important for anyone intending to get married to go through premarital counseling with his/her fiancéé/fiancé. There are churches or preachers who don’t take premarital counseling as a vital aspect of preparing these two friends engaged in a marriage relationship.

Some churches encourage one year or not less than six months of premarital counseling sessions where they take the affianced through many topics. They empower them with soft skills which are the strong foundations of marriage and how to build a healthy and lasting relationship.

Premarital counseling provides very valuable tools and insights that a couple can use to navigate through life challenges and focus on building a blissful marriage. There are many sessions covering marriage matters that either the groom and the bride, the church, or parents should never take for granted. The issues handled in these sessions may never be taught anywhere in school.

These sessions are very practical and give a lot of knowledge and wisdom that creates an atmosphere for the affianced to enter this marriage with confidence. Premarital counseling eliminates fear and anxiety about marriage.

It is not a guarantee that people who go through premarital counseling don’t face challenges in marriage. But someone has knowledge of how to handle the situation. Whatever happens in marriage may not sound new to their ears like those who missed premarital counseling.

Parents should be concerned if their children are missing such sessions as they prepare to get married. If the church does not provide such sessions, then you can arrange for them to get trained premarital counselors or a couple that is well experienced in marriage and is passionate and can take them through premarital counseling. But it is something I would encourage anyone intending to get married not to miss. It should also not be done because it is one of the church requirements and therefore the affianced do it to fulfill the pre-wedding church traditions.

The affianced should invest their time in learning about marriage as much as they can. The sessions build you from scratch and make you almost an expert in a field that you have yet to start. Premarital counseling helps them build a strong foundation for their future together. It's a proactive step that can benefit them in the long run.

The affianced should be encouraged to have open and honest conversations with the counseling couple or priest/pastor during premarital counseling. They should be able to become vulnerable in order to have all their concerns, fears, and expectations of marriage addressed.

Premarital counseling sessions should start early enough before the wedding to allow enough time to address any issues that may arise. These sessions should be able to help the affianced understand each other's emotional needs and how to support each other in their marriage journey. Marriage is not a garden of roses and challenges are inevitable. Nonetheless, when they are equipped with knowledge and skills on how to address them, the chances of thriving in their marriage are high.

We should all get to know that premarital counseling also strengthens the commitment of couples to their marriage relationship. They are able to make informed decisions and discuss on their own the best they need for their marriage and family to be sustained.

It is in the best interest of the affianced to have adequate premarital counseling sessions that are intended to lay a strong foundation for their marriage. Therefore, our children should never think that they are just a church requirement. They are the beneficiaries of these sessions for all their marriage relationship.

The writer is the Executive Director of Hope Regeneration Africa, parenting coach, marriage counselor and founder – Men of Purpose Mentorship Program.